Laos

It was 12 years since I was last in Laos, "tribes people" were a common sight on the street as were opium and marajuana for sale and street money changers hungry for dollars with all deals done on a calculator as no one spoke a common language. Guest houses and restaurants were few and far between and if you got on a bus or boat that had no chickes on board you knew you'd crossed back to Thailand.

2011 and this time we flew into Vientiene. A very mellow airport and a completely confused immigration official as my 6 week beard was not on the passport photo. This seemed to worry him a lot. It was hot hot hot again and funky cafes abound with expensive hotels to back them up. It was still a mellow place but not much to do apart from hang out in the shade and enjoy the very relaxed atmosphere of a naturally laid back country.
We headed up to Vang Vieng which had changed from a 2 street town to a 10 street town ful of cafes showing endless loops of old Friends episodes. It was crap the first time round and it ain't improved with age. By 5 o'clock it was full of pissed backpackers collapsing in the street and screaming a lot. They'd all been tubing- floating down the river on a car inner tube stopping off at bars along the way. I gave it a miss, it looked so boring I was afraid of falling asleep and drowning myself. A once sleepy town was now mostly full of knob heads but it's the locals who are selling them the alcahol so the double edged sword of the tourist dollar.
However hire a bike and ride for 5 minutes and its back to serenity in the countryside. We rode a few km's out of town over a bamboo bridge were some women were slaughtering a water buffalo. On through banana trees and a bit of jungle to reach Secret Canyon and the sport climbing routes. Great position and great routes, good posotive rock and a smattering of climbers from Ameria, Poland and Canada. We had 2 days here then climbed at Na Pha Daeng Mountain about 20 km out of town. We hired a pick-up to take us there. Cross a field of cabbages and follow a few jungle trails to reach the routes. Some hard vertical rock is here. Much harder than the previous 2 days.
We helped the local guy who looks after the place and whose land you cross wash out a nasty machete wound in his hand. Iodine, clean bandage and spare for him was our good deed of the day. He still charged us the 5000 kip to cross his land,about 50p but I guess we are rich beyond his wildest dreams.
We had a day off and rode out to some caves for a look around. A huge thunderstorm erupted as we peddaled down roads of blood red dirt. Pretty dramatic hey! This time we had to pay to go in. On my previous visit we just turned up and nosed about.

We were now headed up to Luang Prabang the UNESCO town and apparently a haunt of celeb types these days. The prices of hotels certainly proved this and no bargains were to be found. The trendy cafes were charging more than restaurants at home for a meal and the amount of well heeled tourists walking around certainly will strike it off the budget list soon. A night market was set up every night selling clothes etc. The LonelyPlanet assuring at least the money goes straight to the locals. The amount of people I saw unloading their goods from 4 wheel drives though I reckon me and Liz need the money more than them. Plenty of "eco-tours" are offered to visit hill tribes thoughh the only thing eco about them I think is the name. I passed on this as the last time the tribe people were walking down the street ignoring you not setting themselves up in human zoos waiting for a fleet of mini buses and zoom lenses to arrive. With an airport being built by the Chinese going to be ready by 2013 and big enough to accept jumbo jets the days of peace are numbered I would say. It will become a peninsula of overpriced cafes surrounded by concrete hotels and thronged by tourists. However if you want a place to saty for a fwew days in a swanky hotel and sit in a posh Frech colonial era cafe I couldn't reccomend anywhere better.

We took a boat to Huay Xai on the Thai border from here, a 2 day ride down the Mekong with an overnight stop in Pakbeng. Last time it was wait for a cargo boat to head down river. Now you pile on the tourist boat and make sure you get a seat away from the engine at the back. As we were heading against the current each day took about 10 hours but it was pleasent to watch the river glide by and see villages up on the banks and occasional other boats floating by. Weird limestone formations and what looked like slate rise out the river and whirlpools hug the banks. A great trip but a lot quicker coming the other way.

Laos is a really relaxed place. Perhaps the most laid back Asian country I've been to . I was really torn between going back as it was perhaps one of the best travel experiences I have ever had. Last time I travelled with my mate Stuart. Our only guide was a map drawn on the back of a fag packet. This was from some random traveller we met who had just come back from up north. We used this for 3 weeks as our guide. The food was awful and so were the buses. River travel was a lot more common and traditional dress was the norm rather than the exception. We broke down in buses and boats and ate food I could not describe or name. With sounding like a moaning old cynic yes it was a lot better then and although I enjoyed it this time I wish I hadn't gone back. Mass tourism and globalisation plus satellite telly and internet I think is leading to a more uniform and boring world. Yes everyone deserves to make money and have a good as life as possible and I wish them all the best but on a purely selfish level it makes travelling a lot less fun.
Greg.